Razbirat Page presents (proudly, iharke) Literary Corner

A literary piece below has been sent to me by an Armenian from Montreal, Canada named komitasi Pze. It may represent one of the jewels of a modern Armenian Slang literature. I appreciate this nice contributionby Pze from Komi10 and offer his little funny dialog to your attention.
Oh, and one advice: it would be better if you print it and read athome. Reading such a long passage in front of a computer screen may hurt your eyes.
Ha laaav, lav, uzum es stegh kardas, karda! Ko achkeri hamar em asum!!! Karevora insurance unenas! Ev ayspes, Yerevani poghotsum handipum en erku Yerevantsi.

Written by: komitasi Pze

Hamazasp-. Barilus Razmik jan, vontses @nker?
Razmik-. Barlus Hamo jan, im hamov axper; lavem aper, du lav @lnes.
	Inshka Ham jan?
H. Ape, amarayin strizhka u seqsualny knizhka.
R. To lave e, humorov malchishka.
H. Ho ban-man chi @le Raz, inshvor ashqis ala-bula es erevum?
R. Ara de gides,ereg irgun tgheqov eli buxavat @lanq.
H. Axper et ashkit tak xiya kaptats chem uzum hartsnum, tsavt tanem.
	Baits, es hima inch vrodzi dobry paxmel es ha?
R. To che-ha ay axper, aravot tataraxi zartna,
	mekel jogi vor chuzhoy paxmel dvizheniner em uzum anem,
	asi helnem dalani mot mihat x@dr gtnem asem 'p@pzi vrovt trnem ara'.
H. Ba Raz jan, tgheq@ asin ivshvor ereg utush-x@mushneri mech eyk aper?
R. Ara ha aper, ereg skzbits Ponchents tunneynq,
	heto el irigva yan pokvanq Hovoyi banaki qefin.
H. Et Ponchents yan xi eyk zaxod are vor?
R. Ape ba Ponchi tatu yotn u qarsunqner;
	voroshel eyn nuyn or@ anein, vortev esorva-orov et gides inshkan tsaxsa.
	Ape es martik nents seghan ein qtse,
	tatun ov gider-chgider sagh dzqve ekel ein oghormatas xmelu.
	Vontsor muftichineri asotsiatsiayi zhoghov @lner aper.
H. Isk Ponch@ vontsa aper, incha anum, ashxtuma?
R. Aper, tranq @ntaniqov obshi darmayed en, namaki gordzi vrayen.
H. Ch@jogi et karogha poshtum en ashxtum?
R. To che ara, inshvor puzaty axpar barekamner unen fransiayum,
	srants nents strashny namakner en ghrkum,es miamit axparikner nel
	pogh@ manrits kachat en anum Hayastan, vor irants xextch-u-krak
	barekamutyun@ sovits ch@kotorvi. Ponch@ asuma nents en @steyi iravitchak@
	nerkayatsre, vrodzi nents drutyun@ ste mitetev
	Chechnyaits lava baits miqichel Somaliyits vata.
H. Ape,lava, basharum en anum en; lish by yes Moskvayi
	horoxpors veshniyov kut em tali vor pogh gh@rki,
	mutit em anum vrodzi Erevanum gordz gtnel@ vapshe dzev chi.
	Ara ba axper, xi nisya etam erkuharur dolary hamar
	garazhum akumlyatory jur poxem kam el aptovy shukayum daxli hetev@ bun dnem.
	Aper vor tch@shtov xosanq, tents zapadlo gordzer@ im hamar apaga chen.
	Yes lutshe nstem taxtin spasem baxtin,
	kantste urish prashlyakneri nman mi erku kopeki hamar anuns qtsem.
R. Ham jan, vapshe xelkin motik baneres asum;
	orinak Kyazhi dvayur@dny axper@, Losht@, hazar dolar
	sran qtsela u michev himaye tulen tratsa. Ara, mtatsumem
	ba tents idyot ban kanen, hazar dolari hamar ba axport
	k@qtses. Ara gon@ mi tas hazar dolar @lner asey ha,
	te che tents melki u dzishovy ban anoghnerin pti
	ugharkes sagh kyank m@litsa ashxaten, hors arev ara.
H. Raz jan, tentsa aper, dar@ poxvela. Vontsor Tatulna
	yerqum " darnatsela, horatsela, pchatsela ays ashxar@".
	Ape tghen gidi incha asum, kyanqi dprots@ gerazantsik avartela.
	Yes qez asem ape, geleri ashxara, du vor urishnerin
	chutes, qez nents kul ktan, mersi el chen asi.
	Ape, duzn asem, indz pogh@ menak chitaqatsnum,
	yes naturi shat kortsnelu ban chunem,hents mi hat
	perevarot eghav, xoski yete es gharabaghtsik mez
	sksen arten shemushki ugharkel, u nents palitichesky
	samasud sk@si, vor dort-u-besh dvizheniner sk@sen,
	kmtnem hents et dvizhenineri amena tapovi kip meshtegh@
	u vontsor Mesrop Mashtotsi ucheniknerits mek@ usel er
	"payqar,payqar minchev verch"; khasnem im uzats pashtonin
	u davay en sagh abizhniknerin vor hima indz
	xangarum en kdnem u amen dzev kchoqtsnem.
R. Ara, Ham jan, yete tentsa asa het@t tsentr atnasheniner pahenq.
	Ape nents askovt @ngela vor obshi mer zhoghovurt@
	mitesaka dare. Sagh inshvor soghun tperen dare,
	chen kisvum irar het, sagh inshvor bisnesnerits en
	xosum, irar tak cherezchur shat en qandum;
	arach gideynq vor hayer@ metsam@tutiamb ashxarum
	arachi teghn eyn gravum, ape hima arten razgavorner ka
	vor naxandzutyunovel karanq voski medal shahenq; ara axper martik arten
	zorov en irar bari axorzhak asum. Aper, baits
	ch@morananq vor menq liq@ dzhvarutyun tesats azgenq,
	Santa Barbaran michev verch ch@nayats azgenq, momi lusi tak
	blot xaghtsats azgenq, kranti jrov xali lvatsats azgenq,
	tranvi hetev@ vaxtin kaxvats azgenq, vopshem mist irar
	dzer@-dzeri brnats u irar katsov xpelov arach gnatsogh azgenq.
	Ham jan, yes qez mi ban el asem,himikva hayer@
	vapshe qti tsak chunen, vonts qamin qshuma
	tents el etum en. 'Unisyonniye Vetrom'  zhoghovurt
	manrits kdarnanq ete sents bespridel sharunakvi.
	Aper qo arev, namusn u tasib@ aneresutian u azatam@tutian
	het rakirovka enq arel. Ape mnuma menak pabirozi
	u araghi ginnel tangana, vor lichno yes amendzev zzvem,
	tqem ameninchi vra, grvem zhamanakavor abizhnikneri miyutyun
	u tixarya pl@stam Los.
H. Ara lav e Raz jan, mi urax ban patmi aper.
	 Asum es, et qarsunqits heto t@rar Hovoyi banaki qefin
	 u plotni @nde lrvar, ha?
R. Aper et qefin lurj pis harpa, tents yerevi mi erku
	shapat chey harpe. Aper, vopshem lsi, Hovoyi banaki qefner ape;
	tnetsik mi vaxt pogh ein t@ke vor gzhi tuxt haneyn,
	vor mer lav axpor@ banak chtaneyn; vobshem nentseyn
	dasavore, et tuxt@ tcharel ein. Aper qef-uraxutyun,
	amenich tsentrer, prost@ verchum qaqi ham@ helav.
H. Ape yes Hovoyin lav gidem, mivaxt irar het veshni
	bisedkum lrvats shemushka eynq ch@rtum, @stits-@ndits
	eynq xosum, vopshem quchi sxodken pahum eynq vor
	vdrug ishvor xpotsi @lner, qtseynq pyati,
	vraz zinveynq, tgheqin havqeynq u pokveynq bazari.
R. Ape, el-du-sus jahelutyun ek unetse eli.
	Axper, Hovon iskakanits vyshi tghaya. Qez parz asem
	vor tchisht hasknas: Hovon ape kyanqi imast@ jogats,
	urishi mashna ch@lvatsats, karmir guyni naski ch@haqats,
	u mi voti vra ch@ppzats tghaya. Ape, mi anqam Hovoyis
	het mi tetev irar haqanq. Vopsem inshvor koxki taghi gyadeqi het
	kash er eghe, tenam Hovon apal-tapal galisa hayat.
	Ekav mot@s asuma ba 'axper duret tu pti etam im maqrutian
	hamar katelniyi hayat@ Chaxkalints vra krakem'.
	Ara asi 'miat hangstatsi, hangarts mantrazh ch@ngnes,
	gidem varvatses, hesa za adno Hakopikents havqenq
	etanq trants tsakenq arunner@ xmenq'. Esi ba 'che Raz jan,
	yes trants menakov pti k@ztsnem, axpor pes duren tu etam,
	te che gnum em Sashikents tun jaghats@ kam gaz@vin
	vekalem etam'. Yes el asi, 'ara lav inches cham@rve,
	mi erku rope spasi hesa ketanq'. Es dod glox@
	ch@lsets indz u pokvav Sashikents yan. Yes el mughamov
	asi, 'de raz vor du Razin ches lsum, gna u raz-i-navsigda
	hishi vor yete razmakanatip razbirat @lni Raz@ et razborkin chi xarnvi'.
H. Ara, baits, Hovoyi her@, Gago dzian, tsentr demqa.
	Yes el kez nents asem vor chotki hask@nas:
	ape inq@ xash@ dzerov utogh, urishnerits sigaret ch@krakogh,
	quchi razbiratneri verchum qyast@mi svarka anogh,
	figurni katani kyanqum ch@nayats, vobshem tchisht@ sxalits
	jogogh marta. Gides che hamel lav graget tipa, nardu
	zareri qtselu vra kandzidatskiya pashpane.
	Baits Raz jan, heto chasir e et gzhi
	tuxt hanely pogh@ irants vorduts.
R. Aper, inshqan yes em lse, asumen Hovoyi en Losi qerina
	ugharke; en kris qerin e vor Hovon veshniyov q@frtumer.
	Xoxmen ena vor, yete et vanetsi qerin pogh@ ch@ghrker,
	'tenkyu', to akanj@ kanchi, arandz gzhi t@xti mer
	yexpayr Hovanes@ banakits cher kara abxadit @ler.
	Ara ba lsi verchatsnem et banaki qefi patmutyun@.
	Hors arev, qef@ vonts sksanq hishumem, baits vonts
	verchatsrinq menak mer harevan Ofik totan giti.
	Aper, duzn asem, sagh qef@ toshni pripaminat chem
	anum, baits hishumem vor polni xod qefi mech eynq.
	Hishum em vor pad kanets sagh kenatsner@ xmanq,
	mnumer manak Aram Asatriani u Selen Dzioni kenats@
	x@meynq. Tamaden el ashxar tesats marter, nents ashki
	takov nayum er vor 'nidaybog' mek@ sachkavat aner,
	srazu zhe hanum, zholty kart@chkayer tsuts tali.
	Ape urem@, moment hela balkon vor mi qich tqem-mqem,
	mekel tenam mihat puzaty 'mokry asfalt' beemveyov
	takits antsnuma. Ara j@ghaynatsa,m@tkums asi 'es furazhki baxt@
	vonts berets; hima vor @ste @lner et gyozal mashnen
	vrits kqtsey iran el balkonits kqtsey'. Aper dux@s milioner,
	karay helney hraparak u en fantanneri moti sagh
	ankap frfratsogh parsiknerin parskeren mer qrfey.
	Aper ba heto qefi vaxt, miat nents matghash kakatch tesa,
	koxknel miat ch@mo yabaxti k@p@rchkvum er. Motikatsa, es
	harifin asi, 'ay shipiznyak du @ste heriq chi
	titiritner anes'. Esi asuma, 'kneres aper baits inq@
	im qurna'. De gides qefs milyona, qtsi-brni mtatsi es
	baradin hastat mutilovkeqa anum. Fratsi asi,
	'varyant ch@ka bes, ete qur@ta xi qo rozh@ indz tents
	chi dzum?' Tenam es xot@ hush @lav paxav, gnalutsel
	inshvor asats ste eghi hesa k@gam. Yes el et vaxt
	fratsi es sirun dzaqin asi,  'barev karmir arev-kanach terev, yes Razn em.
	Yete uzum es qez adnaRazovi serov bavararem?'.
	Es d@mbon ch@jogets yerevi im karalevsky padxod@,
	karmrav-kaptav, asets 'Vyaxk, lkti',u trav motits@s.
	Yes el hetevits goratsi 'Lkti, u mi ban el avel!
	Karogha tegh@ ch@berir ay axchi, hl@ nayi ho
	vret pitno chimnats'. Et momentel, mek@ koxkits
	nizashto bzets ashqis. Yes el gides lav harpatsey,
	zenqs vraz sh@prti polin u vra tvi vor sran qtsem
	qatsu tak. Goratsi 'toghek ara! toghek pti xpem!'
	Es kazyolnerne ch@jogelov es kyanqits qashvan mi yan
	vor indz tegh tan xpelu. @te mi hat el udar tchakatis
	kera, p@rva getnin u el ban chem hishum. Ba Ham jan,
	tentsel es aravot manto zartna u pis varvats asi pti
	helnem astanofka u achudzax saghin krysakan k@pnem.
H. Ha Raz jan, tents mazalu baner ape................

Kudos to 'Komitasi Pze'. Good job!.......

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